Sunday, 29 January 2012

Total Boob

boob1 Slang
1. an ignorant or foolish person; booby
2. Brit an embarrassing mistake; blunder
3. a female breast *he he he*

I take care to surround myself with groups of people so that when I say something silly, it can get lost in the crowd.

After spending time with friends, I go home and pull apart what I said, cringing over the ridiculous moments where I wish I had just kept my mouth shut, cos it was not in any way connected to my brain at that point. More and more, I keep my mouth shut.

I misinterpret, mis-hear and suffer the consequences. Later, I realise what was meant/said and hope that they weren't offended by the sudden change of topic. I suspect I often leave people a little confused, especially when I talk about being emotional fragile when they were referring to being physical fragile.
That was a fun topic shift.

Then there are the inappropriate comments. Looking at some mega sparkly stretch sequins *squeeeeeeeeeeee sparkliness* that come on a roll 30 cm wide *30 cms of pure delight*, which I have always longed for and thought it would be so awesome to make a boob tube out of it, if I was younger, thinner, etc. He duly admired it and asked "but what could he do with it?" So, because my brain was busy thinking "SHINY!", it forgot to think twice and speak once, out of my ditzy mouth came the reply, "make a boob tube".

Stretchy sparkly goodness!

Of course. Cos what else might one suggest to a 6 ft something male? It would be the first thing that came to mind for most people, wouldn't it? Go on, be nice to me and say it was your first idea, too?
He looked strangely at me, asked what I thought he would do with a boob tube, and I ducked around the corner to desperately and intently admire some lace with nice beading. Or maybe to avoid answering. The shiny white beads totally looked red as they reflected my glowing cheeks.

It is nice to have friends. My best friend once commented that the "people who stay my friends are the people who will put up with me and my madness".
Cheers to the universe for tolerant friends!


  1. Haha! But what was he doing even LOOKING at the sequins?? And seriously? What else would you do with that sparkly stuff but make a boob tube?? Of COURSE it's the first thing that entered my head!!

  2. *giggles* Thank you Nomad!!
    He was looking at the sequins because I pointed at them and said "I love these sequin fabrics, look at them."
    Then he made his funny comment of "What could I do with it?" which I could have made a witty, funny and altogether appropriate comment to, but instead...
    Actually, if anyone can come up with that witty and funny reply, I'll memorise it for next time! ;-)